Archive of ‘gratitude’ category

Set Your Loved Ones Free


On Children
 Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer’s hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Last week as I was helping my son pack for a 2 week trip to California with his swim team, I found myself feeling the same kind of ‘not wanting to let him go’ feelings I had on the first day of preschool.  After he left for his big adventure I found myself feeling a sort of dull ache in my heart.  Sort of a homesick kind of feeling.   I have those feelings often.  Not just for my son, but for people I love deeply.   Over the years I’ve learned that I tend to over-nurture and hold on in co-dependent ways – and having worked with hundreds of clients, I realize I’m not alone in those tendencies!  So I’ve developed a practice that helps me and my clients let go of people we love so that they – and we – are free.

When I first began this practice, I was very hesitant.  I thought letting someone go was synonymous with not loving them.   I thought cutting energy cords was synonymous with cutting someone out of my life.  But after using this technique (and tweaking it over the years) I have discovered that letting someone go in this way is a most loving and caring action – for them and for me.  It allows them to connect to the real source of life energy rather than mistakenly believing that I am the source of their life energy.  It allows them to be free to expand into their fullness without any limitations that I might unwittingly be placing on them.  And it allows me to do the same.

You can do this with your children, parents, siblings, pets, friends, spouse, co-workers…anyone you love and wish to set free. 

Set your loved ones free.twitter-icon

Here’s how I do it:

  1. I create a small altar with items that represent the person I am setting free and items that represent Divine Love. (I always have a representation of earth, air, fire and water on my altars. In this photo you’ll see crystals (earth), a vase of flowers (water and air – flowers represent air), a candle (fire)  You’ll also see other items that represent my son and Divine Love.)
  2. I light a candle
  3. I offer gratitude for the person.
  4. I close my eyes and ask to be filled with Divine Love.
  5. I take a deep breath.
  6. Then I imagine the person standing in front of me. I imagine all the energetic cords connecting the two of us.  (Relax.  If you are someone who doesn’t easily ‘see’ things in your imagination, just have the thought.)
  7. With my heart, I call forth Archangel Michael and ask him to cut all the cords of energy connecting me to this person.
  8. As the cords of energy are cut, I imagine the person’s energy returning to them and my energy returning to me. I feel my energy fill up and I see their energy fill up and get bigger.
  9. Then I say (out loud or silently): “I love you and I release you to your experience of life.  You are connected to the source of life and you are free to expand.  And I am connected to the source of life, and I am free to expand.”
  10. As I say that I imagine them being held in the palm of God’s hand, surrounded by angels and I imagine myself the same way.
  11. Then I say “thank you, thank you, thank you.” (as the Christian mystic, Meister Eckhart said “If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is ‘thank you,’ it will be enough.”)

I hope this practice helps you as much as it has helped me.

In love and freedom,


PS- There are only 11 Divine Your Life sessions available this summer.

When you don’t feel ‘enough’

Have you ever felt

That you simply weren’t enough

Although it’s a lie?

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Goddess Dr. Deb KernFor me, it comes in waves. Usually when I’m feeling stressed. And despite all evidence that my friends may offer, I just don’t feel like a good enough _______. Not a good enough mom. Daughter. Entrepreneur. Friend. Teacher. You name it.

Last week was one of those weeks. I tried all sorts of things to bust out of that feeling. I prayed, chanted, journaled, walked, talked to friends and even to my therapist. But the feeling persisted. Then I remembered my number one strategy: DANCE! And as Spirit would have it, just as I had the inclination to dance, someone shared a new song with me called…..are you ready?…..”I’M ENOUGH!”

So I created an entire dance class based on the theme “I’M ENOUGH” ~ and together we shook off all the limiting beliefs that trapped us into feeling like we weren’t and we expanded the cellular knowing that we are. It was so powerful that I wanted to share these two songs with you so you can dance the feeling of ENOUGH into every cell of your body, too.


Dr. Deb

p.s. Serendipitously, just as I was returning to feeling good about myself, a birthday package arrived from my beloved business guardian angel, Adeah. She had sent a photo of me to Lisbeth Cheever-Gessaman, an artist I have admired for a long time (and whose art you’ve seen on my blog many times) – and Lisbeth turned my photo into pure magic. It’s the photo I used above. Just wanted to give you the full story

Free Film Screening

Free Film Screening Sacred Science

I love this movie and I’m thrilled they are offering a free online screening for the next 10 days. Don’t miss it!

After the Storms

It was a calm evening. I had just returned from taking my teenage son and a friend to see the movie “Chef” (which I highly recommend!) and suddenly the skies opened up and wind started howling. It seemed like a normal summer storm until we noticed the pane glass windows moving in and out like liquid. That’s when we both ducked into the closet underneath our stairs.

Within a minute, the power went out and we began hearing what sounded like mobs whacking our house with baseball bats. Loud cracks and pops. And armies marching on our roof with their heavy boots. Crashing, smashing, shattering and whining sounds continued for two hours.

When we emerged from our refuge we  were relieved to find that the interior of our home was fine. But with no power, we couldn’t tell what had happened outside until the next morning. That’s when we discovered that a large portion of our roof was scattered across our yard and, in fact, all across our neighborhood! Wood fences had been snapped off at the posts. And a neighbor’s trampoline had turned into a weapon of mass destruction, taking down a tree and busting up a rock wall


When I went for a walk on our trail I wept. My beloved trees! I walk and talk with these trees almost every single day. I love them all – and so many had lost their lives.


As the clean up efforts began I started noticing the parallel in my own life and in the lives of the people I counsel. Storms sometimes sweep through, terrifying us. And after the storm, mental, emotional and physical debris block energy pathways. If we don’t remove the debris, our energy can’t run wide open. It either gets cut off completely and we are paralyzed, or we begin to simply reroute the energy around the debris and we get sick.


Storm after storm, if debris isn’t cleared we end up with energy that is shut down or running haywire. That’s why we need to constantly be clearing the way. It’s an ongoing process.

What storms have passed through your life? Have you cleared all the debris?

Love & Blessings,

A Wish For All Mothers and Daughters

Every time I try to write a poem or a letter about my mom and how much I love her I get stuck – because anything I manage to put down in words simply doesn’t do her justice or express adequately the depth of my love and appreciation for her!

So when I heard this poem that my dear friend and colleague Dr. Christiane Northrup wrote in honor of Mother’s Day I thought “Now THIS is a poem worthy of my mom!”

Dr. Christiane Northrup’s Poem:

THANK YOU, MOM, for your steadfast love and support!

I am so grateful for the amazing relationship I have with my mom and I feel blessed to have had the opportunity to experience the transformation of our relationship from mother-daughter to friend-friend. Talking to other women, however, I realize not everyone has the same positive, supportive relationship with her mom that I have.

Dr. Northrup speaks so eloquently about the importance of a mother’s love and support:

“A mother’s love is the most powerful and fierce force in the world. This love—or lack thereof—is also the blueprint that creates a daughter’s health and belief system for her lifetime.”

If you would like help navigating the precious connection with your mother, Dr. Northrup is offeringonline course a live online course called Lightening the Mother Load: Healing Strategies for Daughters.

Is it time for you to rediscover, celebrate, or heal the mother-daughter bond in your life? If so, click here to register for her course.

PS- The Embody Your Bliss weekend retreat is SOLD OUT if you had wanted to attend click here to join the wait-list.


Earlier this week I noticed this oak tree as I was walking on our neighborhood trails.

See those tiny branches growing on the trunk?  Those are called suckers.  They divert nutrients for optimal tree growth.

As I continued my walk I reflected on all the suckers in my own life…the things that divert energy for an optimal life.

Here’s just a partial list of what came to mind:

  • Compulsively checking emails, Facebook and texts
  • Trying to make everything okay for everyone
  • Fear that I’m not leading people effectively
  • Criticizing myself for my looks, how I parent, how I don’t have a garden this year…
  • Worrying…about anything.  
  • Taking phone calls when it isn’t convenient for me to stop what I am doing
  • Clutter
  • Doubting myself
  • Wanting things to be different than they are

You know what?  It’s time to prune the suckers!!!!


I have the perfect pruning shears to do the job!


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