Why I went halfway around the world to heal.

My issues were stuck in my tissues. This is not a normal blog topic, but it’s something I feel called to share with you because I know I’m not the only one who has dealt with this and I’m hoping my story will be helpful.

Last year my marriage ended a few months shy of its 20th anniversary. It was a marriage that I cherished and nourished and tried my best to make work; but ultimately I couldn’t keep it going.

Despite all the tools in my tool belt (prayer, meditation, PranaShakti dance, yoga, journaling, etc) and all the help I received from therapists, body workers, energy workers, spiritual guides and friends I couldn’t seem to let go of the past and pull myself out of grief, depression, fear and anger.

I knew I needed to let go and move on, but it just wasn’t happening.

 

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Then I received bad lab results.  The stress had taken its toll on my organs, glands and immune system.  This news added a new emotion:  shame.  After all, I’d spent 27 years studying and teaching mind/body techniques for healing.  I, of all people, knew that every cell in my body was eavesdropping on my thoughts.   So why was I still swimming in an ocean of unhealthy thoughts?

 

Unfortunately, knowing that my stressful emotions were the cause of my physical symptoms wasn’t enough to heal me.  So I did what I always do when I can’t find an answer with my intellect:  I prayed for guidance to come in my dreams.  And the very night I said that earnest prayer I received clear guidance to go to India for panchakarma (the Ayurvedic protocol that eliminates toxins and strengthens immunity.)  While it made perfect sense to do panchakarma, I thought there was no way I could take the time to travel all the way to India!   

I felt like one of my clients when they simply can’t see the logic in the guidance I’m offering – only to discover after following the guidance that it was exactly what they needed.  So I ignored all the ‘logical’ reasons why going to India for 3 weeks was not feasible (I’m a single, working mom with a son who’s about to go to college!) and booked the trip anyway.

My whole nervous system instantly relaxed when I arrived at the Ayurvedic hospital high in the mountains of Tamil Nadu, surrounded by tea plantations and eucalyptus trees.  And that was the first step in my healing….relaxing and breathing pure, mountain air.

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Next week I’ll share the exact protocols I followed – and how you can do some of them at home.   Stay tuned

AN INVITATION:

It’s not India….but it’s wonderful self-care you can access for free from wherever you live.  My friend and colleague Ashley Burnett interviewed me along with some of my favorite women (including Terri Cole, Rochelle Scheick and Sianna Sherman) for an online event called the “Uninhibited Women Leadership Conference.”   Just click on the image below to register:

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13 Comments on Why I went halfway around the world to heal.

  1. Marlene
    April 21, 2016 at 9:05 am (2 years ago)

    Brilliant listening!! Love your honesty in sharing all of this………grief, letting go, shame, and hitting pay dirt. You are amazing!

  2. Gratitude
    April 21, 2016 at 9:26 am (2 years ago)

    I want to thank you for your post. It has resonated with me on such a deep level. I too ended a long marriage that I cherished to listen to my heart and begin a new. The grief has been devastating and had taken over most of my life. I lost 15 pounds, stress levels went up and my labs were all over the place. I still struggle but I found leaving the environment was so important to my health and to detox. I am about to make another big move to completely leave the environment. I am changing jobs, moving to a big city which is not me, and leaving behind friends and place of knowing of 18 years. The calling has been so strong I can’t deny it. I am financially taking a large pay cut to follow this path. I am trusting in the Great Mystery to guide my way and to take care of me. I am so grateful to know that others women are empowering themselves the same. By listening deeply within and trusting in the unfolding of life. Thank you Dr. Deb for sharing this part of you journey!

  3. Dr. Deb
    April 21, 2016 at 9:55 am (2 years ago)

    I’m so glad my post resonated with you and I’m sending prayers for your continued courage as you joyfully expand into the Great Mystery of your miraculous life.

  4. Dr. Deb
    April 21, 2016 at 9:56 am (2 years ago)

    Thank you, Marlene!

  5. Alexandra
    April 21, 2016 at 10:25 am (2 years ago)

    Congratulations on your extraordinary courage. Women are such natural healers that sometimes we forget we are human and must honor that intuitive voice that says we can’t fix everything. Look forward to the next installment of your bravery. Blessings 🙂

  6. Dr. Deb
    April 21, 2016 at 10:54 am (2 years ago)

    Thank you so much, Alexandra. Blessings to you!

  7. Julie
    April 21, 2016 at 2:39 pm (2 years ago)

    I so felt as you did when I got divorced (also an almost 20 year marriage). I needed to get divorced and it was the right thing to do but my entire body went a lot crazy. I had the skills to “know” what to do to make things better but was paralyzed by the wake of my own emotions that I was truly just killing my own body with stress, worry, anxiety, depression etc. I am now 2 years later coming out of the storm that had begun to be my new normal. Thank you for sharing your story and the healing protocols – because it is only if we are willing to share that we can validate ourselves and others as they struggle with these issues as well.

  8. Dr. Deb
    April 21, 2016 at 3:07 pm (2 years ago)

    Julie – Thank you so much for sharing your experience here! We are on the same trajectory….and I know we’re both gonna soar! Many, many blessings to you – and I hope you enjoy the next installments when I share the protocols. We both deserve to fully heal and come through to the other side stronger and brighter.

  9. kate
    April 21, 2016 at 8:59 pm (2 years ago)

    Ahh…Deb./ Clean, clear and vulnerable. So many invitations… to listen to our bodies, our inner wisdom, to live the life we’re here to live and to lean in to our higher self, even when we’re scared and because that’s exactly how we feel. Thank you goddess Deb!

  10. Dr. Deb
    April 21, 2016 at 9:26 pm (2 years ago)

    Oh, Kate~ Thank you for these beautiful words of reflection. You are a gift!

  11. Theresa
    May 24, 2016 at 3:29 am (2 years ago)

    Thank you Dr. Deb. Landed on this beautiful share this morning, just as I was preparing to journal and looking for inspiration. Serendipity! The mind-body-soul connection is so powerful and also, so simple a truth. With my journey, it took an aggressive form of cancer, diagnosed at an advanced stage, for me to finally realize the answers I was searching for were quite literally embodied within. I just needed to reframe and you helped me with that in our sessions. Before, I was so self-aware and immersed in Buddhism that a toxic relationship, abusive on every level, became just one more opportunity to practise tonglen and specifically compassion for the other’s suffering – not my own. I’m now in a much healthier place/space in my life with more realistic boundaries firmly in place – which I’m happy to confirm have proven resilient. The mind-body-soul balance is a cherished life lesson for me.

  12. Kathie
    July 26, 2016 at 6:46 am (1 year ago)

    This was exactly what I needed this morning. I wrote in my journal this morning about how I feel like I’ve been using my spirituality as a mask. I have such deep inner wounds that have not healed and they surface every time I experience disappointment in my life. They send me spiriilinh downwards into the exact same place. A place of anger, resentment, victim mentality and blame. It feels terrible. Which then sends me spiriling into “I’m a terrible person and I’m never going to change” abusive thoughts. And then I get stuck there.
    I deeply desire to experience healing. A lasting kind of healing that is sustainable and enriches my spiritual practices. Thank you Deb. This cracked open and allowed light into my very dark heart this morning. I felt extremely connected to your message being a working single mom myself. Bless you.

  13. Dr. Deb
    November 10, 2016 at 11:26 am (1 year ago)

    Blessings to you, Kathie <3

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